Saturday, May 15, 2021

Zucker Papa

 


If you have a bug up your bourgeoisie bum about Marxism, you can blame my fellow Wuppertaller Friedrich Engels. After all, it was Engels who supported Karl Marx financially during the writing of The Communist Manifesto, but then you already knew Marx was a no-account mooch, didn't you?

In addition to stirring up the Worker's Revolution, Engels was himself a textile magnate, effectively buttering both side of his bread, culturally and politically. As a result, today's Germans can get a bit confused as to who is Labor and who is The Man, making it difficult to decide who is responsible for society's ills.

Monday, May 3, 2021

Yer a Peein'

Brand new Symptoms column on the bathroom habits of Europeans and their effect on my fragile manhood: https://thesymptoms.substack.com/p/yer-a-peein?fbclid=IwAR3XdcF9cK-tPih1VEXb-yuxfK95KoZDZ5AejzMoe_9iRT6waAJlZVvs3aY

Be sure to sign up to receive The Symptoms in ye olde inbox while you're at the Substack site. It soothes my wounded ego.

 

Saturday, April 24, 2021

Thursday, April 8, 2021

Old Goat




"The Old Goat," self-portrait. This was inspired by a photograph taken of me at a petting zoo a few years ago. Fellow artist Jeremy Pinkham suggested the photo should be a large oil painting, complete with red, velvet curtain in the background. This one is in pixels rather than oils, obviously, but I hope it retains the intended effect. I thought it was high time I produced a self-portrait which more accurately reflected my age and the subsequent surliness that comes from a lifetime of dedication. And I hoped that a portrait might also be just slightly Satanic.

 

Sunday, April 4, 2021

Saturday, April 3, 2021

String Theorist


Portrait of jazz guitar legend James Slater.

 

Hang 'em High

 


The prints are back! The shop is jam-packed with new portrait prints, plus new editions of the old favorites. 11"x14"on heavy-stock archival paper. Free shipping within the U.S., ships rolled in a sturdy protective tube. Have a gander HERE!

Thursday, March 25, 2021

Friday, February 19, 2021

Substackin'


 You folks remember The Symptoms, right? My illustrated column of autobiographical meltdowns and fist-shaking observations of modern irritations? Well, it still lives, and it's bitchier than ever! Now you can find The Symptoms on the Substack platform, the hip new blogging site featuring all your favorite online columnists who got fired from Politico and Slate. 

It's an exciting time for The Symptoms because I'm currently chronicling my relocation from podunk South Carolina to Wuppertal, Germany. Cultures clash and relative hilarity ensues! Please hit the link and subscribe to The Symptoms on Substack because I really, REALLY need to talk to someone in English.

The Symptoms (substack.com)


Joseph Beuys